The reason I said all of that, however, is because it's been a while since I saw the movie, and then the TV show, and it's been a few months since I read the books, so it's all mashed together now. Also... I missed a whole bunch of episodes of Shadowhunters, so I saw the first 6, and then the season finale, and the one before the season finale...so... I hope this post is more amusing than really informative.
Let's talk about this bomb of a movie. Poor, poor Lily Collins, trying to become an actress, and the agency that thought it was a good idea to sign her because she's Phil Collins' daughter. Sure, we can teach her how to act... she can take acting classes, right? It'll be fine!
Her eyebrow game and her last name are the only things she has going for her. She's not a bad looking girl (she's not a troll, but she's just a pretty face with all the benefits of a life with a chef, a nutritionist, stylist and personal trainer), but man, oh man. She's a terrible actress.
Hollywood tried to make her a thing in that other movie with Taylor Lautner (Right? the Werewolf from Twilight?), and though she was better in this movie, this poor girl can't act to save her life. Her eyebrows did more work than she did in the movies she was in.via GIPHY
Look at much those eyebrows work for their money.
However, let's not forget the rest of the cast of this doomed movie; Jonathan Rhys Meyers (who did this movie to fund his coke habit), Lena Headley, whose single requirement for roles is that she gets to play the mother of child-prodigies, for better or for worse and Lane Pryce, who, much to his surprise, woke up in an alternate universe after hanging himself in his own office.
There is also this guy:
Who... the only reason I remember him is because he got that, "oh yeah, he's been in something" reaction, and also because after watching the show, I realized how the movie cut the love subplot between him and Jace. Who is played by
this guy:
Who, and again, I don't want to piss on people that don't fit my standard of beauty or attractiveness, but he should really be a character actor. Not only does he and Lily have the zero onscreen chemistry, I don't look at him and go, "man, he should play the guy that turns Clary from a high school girl into a full fledged Shadowhunter, and after all of that, when they discover they are "siblings" still question whether kissing your brother is such a big deal."
However, this guy?
If a girl is going to question whether kissing her long lost sibling is such a big deal, I'd buy him.
On that note, the movie feels way too rushed with the attempt to shove all the folklore and urban mythology that Clare meticulously builds up in her first book into one movie... and the movie feels jumbled together and long, despite the twists and turns and googly eyes that Clary and Jace make at each other. With the final reveal of Clary's father and Jace and Clary/Lily long lost siblings, instead of being shocked with wonder of how Jace and Clary/Lily will ever recover, you marvel at Rhys Meyers attempt to sell the terrible script and try to take Lily Collins seriously (though I think there must have been a contingent in his contract that he had to try to act in order to get his coke blocks) to get through his scenes.
I understand the attempt to try and cash in on the rising tide of the Harry Potter and Twilight movie phenomenon, but this movie was a hot garbage mess. Though I think Lane Pryce was relieved that no one asked for the money back and no one bought up the embezzling.
All the fans were disappointed with the movie, and many were concerned with the development of the TV show. With the... 6 (I'm guessimating), that I watched, is a definite improvement from the movie. They cast much better actors and actresses, including the Old Spice guy, who, in my opinion, is the best part of the show.
via GIPHY
I wish he would be given a bigger part... or did he have more of a part to play in the episodes I didn't watch?
As well, Magnas Bane is played by an actor who was on Glee; Harry Shum! The only reason that was exciting for me was because I just watched him in the Netflix Original Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon sequel.
I gathered there is a lot of material for the show to use from her books, so I hope they continue with the show and keep both Isaiah Mustafa and Harry Shum employed. As for the rest of the actors... they look and act like your typical young teen ABC/CW show actors, which is perfect for a show like this.
The TV show is silly and entertaining, though I will have to say it wasn't engaging enough for me to keep tuning back in week after week. Hopefully Hulu brings back the episodes I missed so I can binge. I think it'll be a good binge series. Free Form is literally a no name network, so they need to take the cue from CW and renew everything, regardless of ratings!
And besides, anything is better than that movie.
via GIPHY
No comments:
Post a Comment